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    Sheerah's Sharpshooter 12/14/1999
    Reported by Sheerah Fisher on 1/16/100
    Sheerah's Sharpshooter
    Stephanie Helmsly

    Yahoo! Monday is past, which means there is another edition of Sheerah's Sharpshooter! Guess what! You're reading it! DunDunDun! Well, I'll bring back the ever-popular trivia this week, with a rather strange question! Hey, I'm famous for knowing the useless trivia (as in how old Bischoff was when his hair started going gray), so I'll have yet another stupid question! YEAH! Well, here goes!

    Who is Shane McMahon's wife?
    1) Marisa Marzola
    2) BB
    3) Me
    4) Jessica McMahon
    5) None of the above
    (Note: Send all answers to )

    OUCH! Russo and Ferrera are proving they stink, especially with last week's ratings! This time they got a disappointing 3.0, and a 4.5 share. With hour one getting 3.8, hour two with 2.8, and then 2.5 for the last hour. Owey, that's gotta hurt the ratings war! Raw got a 6.0 rating. With the help of a 5.6 for the first hour, and 6.3 for the last. On the quarter hour where Stephanie McMahon and Triple H were in the ring, they got a 7.2! WOW! WWF is on a roll, and I don't think they can be stopped. Especially with some of the story-lines WCW is coming up with.

    Wanna be a Wrestler? Well, then you should watch "So You Wanna Be a Wrestler?" on ABC's 20/20! It will be on December 16, yes, that's a Thursday. Which mean they are going to be going against not only Thunder, but Smackdown at well! I think it's a bad idea to have it on, on a wrestling night. They would get a whole lot more ratings if it were, oh, lets say, Tuesday. Or some other non-wrestling show day.

    It's official! Russo and Ferrera can do something good! They're switching the Nitro time slot to 8-10, instead of 8-11! I know I've written about this in the past (the distant past), but it deserves to be written about again! Getting rid of an hour with give the program an edge, and not only that, it will allow me to see the Nitro main event, and the Raw main event! The thing that really holds them down in the third hour in the ratings. Just look at last weeks! 2.5 for the last hour! This will be a great move for them, and we'll all get to see more Raw! Hey, you can't beat that!

    Well, it's about time I got to the Sheerah's Sharpshooter Awards! Well, the awards are still run'n strong! Don't forget, you can still vote until January 1st! As I said last time, when entering the awards, if you put me down at best columnist IT WILL NOT BE COUNTED. Alright, now that I have that settled (again), here is the form to fill out! Send it to

    Your Name:

    Best Wrestler of '99:

    Who was the best champ of '99:

    Best Mic Worker:

    Best Tag Team:

    Most improved Wrestler:

    Best Valet/Manager:

    Favorite group:

    Favorite Federation:

    Favorite Columnist:

    Best Theme Song:

    Favorite Web Site:

    Biggest Heel:

    Biggest Face:

    Best quote:

    Worst signing to a contract:

    Most likely to deserve, but never get a good push:

    Most likely to run for President of the United States:

    Now, this is where things will get a little different, all of those categories were just for '99, but not for the NEW Millennium Ones! Remember, don't base these of just this past year, but the entire Millennium! Here goes:

    Best Wrestler of the Millennium:

    Best Tag Team of the Millennium:

    Well, I just got my issue of WCW Magazine today! Okay, I got it a couple of days ago, but I decided to start reading it today. What is interesting is Bret Hart's column. For those of you who haven't read it, it's entirely about Backyard wrestling, and how it isn't too good. I actually agree with him, if professionals get hurt, there's no way that someone who has no training won't. I mean, look at Droz, or even Buff Bagwell! Then go to people like Steve Austin, and even Stevie Richard! Of course, then there's Mick Foley who has had a lot of things broken and bruised in his life. Just with those few injuries said, do you think anyone without training has a chance?

    It is once again, PPV time (wasn't it PPV time last week too?). So, as usual, I have my predictions! This is everything Russo and Ferrera don't want you to know. They tried to keep my mouth shut, but it didn't work! This is what's going to happen at WCW's Starrcade! Ok, ok, maybe this ISN'T whats going to happen. Alright, I admit it, Russo and Ferrera probably don't even know I'm alive, let alone tried to keep my mouth shut. I might as well just say it, this just who I hope/think will win. So, anyway, here goes! For the big one… the Main Event with Bret Hart vs. Goldberg, no DQ, my pick is Bret Hart! Well, Bret Hart with the help of the Outsiders that is. The ladder match between Scott Hall and Chris Benoit, my uncensored pick is Chris Benoit (although I would rather Hall win). Kevin Nash vs. Sid Vicious in the highly over-rated Powerbomb Match, I really don't care who wins. In my opinion, they both stink, so I'll just take a wild guess and say Kevin Nash. Now on to another over-rated match, which is the Bunkhouse Brawl with Jeff Jarrett vs. Dustin Runnels, and my stellar pick is…. Jeff Jarrett! Then the match for the ownership of Miss Liz, Sting vs. Flexy Lexy, and my pick is Sting. Here are my predictions for the other matches as well:

    Creative Control/Curt Hennig vs. Harlem Heat/Midnight
    My pick: Creative Control/Hennig

    Norman Smiley vs. Meng for the Hardcore Title:
    My Pick: Meng because the PTB like to push non-talent.

    Evan Karagias vs. Madusa
    My Pick: Madusa, with Evan in "love" he's a weak little puppy!

    David Flair vs. DDP in a Crowbar on a Pole Match (wow, what name)
    My pick: Well, I hope David Flair wins with the help of that crazy girl who won the Nitro Party a couple weeks ago, but my pick is DDP.

    Big Vito/Johnny "The Bull" vs. Disco Inferno/Lash LeRoux
    My Pick: I hope they all lose

    The Revolution vs. Jim Duggan and 3 Mystery partners (oh goodie)
    My Pick: I saw it's Jim Duggan and his 3 partners (who I think will be Chavo Guerrero, and some other wrestler dumped by the Powers)

    Steve Williams vs. Vampiro
    My Pick: Vampy!

    Poor Shane! I can't believe Triple H through him off of that stage! Well, lets rephrase this, I can't believe Vince would do that to his son. Although, the look on Vince's face was priceless when HHH did the dirty deed! It was one of those classic McMahon looks! Don't ya just love those? Another great part was when X-pac came in and saw Stephanie with Test. She's a married woman! I'm not surprised Xey was mad, that was his friend's wife!

    Wow, I actually watched ECW! That's totally not like me, as my weekly readers know. Alright, I'm not sure if I have this guys name right, but bear with me. I was impressed with a guy I believe who's name is Steve Corino. You know, the guy who went to the Limp Bizcut concert, and totally dissed their music world, and pushed people like the Backstreet Boys, 'N Sync, and his soon to be girlfriend Britney Spears. I like this guy, I haven't seen him wrestle, but he has pretty good mic skills. Another thing about ECW is their news hotline. It's amazing because they don't even have ECW news on it! Well, not from what I've heard. They had some news on "A WWF superstar suspended indefinitely!", and stuff on "Shawn Michaels" and the Nitro Girls no less! Of course, it was news on the Nitro Girls invading ECW, but still, the Nitro Girls?

    Well, Armageddon is over. As I said last week, Stephanie turned on her dear old Daddy! This just proves that the WWF reads my column to get ideas (yeah, right, don't I wish.)! I'll tell you one thing, she looked heel. I didn't see the PPV, but I did see a nice movie of her and Triple H hugging (oohh, how sweet)! I don't know what is was, maybe it was the jacket. Anyway, Steph made the right decision! Of course, I guess this means there's no hope for me and Triple H.

    I can't believe the Even Gown match! These are the times I'm glad I didn't get the PPV. From what I heard, Miss Kitty "flashed" the crowd. What makes me happy is the WWF didn't plan on it happening. It was all the odious Miss Kitty's fault, who thinks the word "modesty" is a dirty word. Well, my perspective on her has certainly changed. Well, I guess it didn't change that much, because I never liked her, and thanks to this I never will! Anyway, I'm also very disappointed because BB didn't drown, and Ivory lost the title!

    This amazes me. The rumors starts on Tuesday (I think) about Eric Bischoff who signed a contract with the WWF and is still under WCW contract! Of course, it was proven to be false, but you'd think you'd at least hear something about him finally getting out of his contract before signing with the WWF. Although, I still have high hopes about him coming! As I've said, that would be Much-o Ratings-o! Of course, if he does get out of his contract he'll probably go over to the Fox federation they're hoping to start. As I've said before, I'm still hoping!

    The Artist Formally Known as Prince Iaukea? Okay, I'm not sure if they're having a take-off of Goldust, or the AFKA Prince there. Well, it doesn't matter who it is a take-off of, because whoever it is, it stinks. Then he put against the Maestro, which either makes it Music vs. Music, or Music vs. Extremely Bad Idea.

    The inevitable happened. Goldberg and Hart are actually making their match heat up. I mean, two friends going against each other for the World Title isn't very interesting. ESPECIALLY when they're both faces. Their interview was pretty interesting, it reminded me of one thing. That thing is Goldberg has zero mic skills. No offence to Goldberg fans, but he really doesn't. I almost nodded off just listening to his few statements. Good things for the people who are heels and yet get a bigger pop than Bret Hart, AKA the Outsiders. They made the interview a little more interesting.

    Wow! Stephanie has changed (yes, I am writing another paragraph dedicated to the McMahon family)! Wow, I never liked her before, and I don't like her now. Although, she has better mic skills! What is it with a being a heel, you always have better Mic Skills when you are one. Oh well, back on to the McMahon subject. Vince is nuts. He's gone, he's just as gone as David Flair is. Then there's Shane, who is the only reasonable one (of course, I might be a bit bias). Poor Shane, poor Vince, and poor Steph who has to wear those pants, and poor Linda who, humm, isn't included in this.

    Wow! The David Flair/Lex Luger vs. Sting/DDP was interesting. Of course, my eye was on David Flair the entire time. I'm glad WCW is finally using him. It took them long enough, but they FINALLY gave him a gimmick he can do! Quite frankly, I think he makes a great crazy guy! He has good mic skills while being crazy, and is very entertaining! I loved his new found friend in the form of a stuffed animal (from the crazy lady a couple weeks back no doubt), and his friend Crow (but remember, you can call him Mr. Bar!).

    Well, I'm sure you've heard about Raw and their possible Time Change from 10-12. Yes, that means wrestling fans would have to be up to midnight to see Raw (or use the magical power of the VCR). I hate it! It's not convenient, or at least not to me. Children can't stay up past 9, teens need to go to school in the morning, and adults have work! So I don't think many people will be around to see their last hour. I think they'd have better luck having their first hour go against WCWs second hour (once WCW changes time slots). Well, the good news about the very late time change is the PTC probably wouldn't have as big a problem with the WWF. Even with that though, I still don't like the idea.

    Well, I'll wrap up my column with a few words about the Main Events. Raw's was interesting. Poor Test, I bet he's heartbroken! Although, I really don't care about that. I just liked the part where Stephanie kept saying "Go help him! He's your partner!". The Nitro Main Event, I didn't really watch. Don't worry, one of these days I'll see it! I'm hoping they'll put on a decent Main Event next week. Well, I can't wrap up my column without my Closing ReMARKs! So here we go!

    ~Chyna, Jericho is always the better competitor!

    ~The Maestro's entrance is just an accident waiting to happen.

    ~Schiavone Stupid Quote of the Week (when referring to Piper's slow count) "Did that seem like a slow count to you?

    ~I would never listen to someone who uses the word "Aint", even when it's used as "Wrestling aint fake".

    ~How can Triple H and Stephanie only be in charge? There is still Vince, Shane, and Linda!

    ~Russo and Ferrera stupid gimmick of the week: "Chris 'Champagne' Kanyon"

    ~I like Stephanie's new Power trip!

    ~Oh, yeah, Season's Greetings!

    Sheerah Fisher, column writer and webmaster of UWZ-Ultimo Wrestling Zone
    The Official Online Home of Sheerah Fisher